FEAR

Fear. How many decisions do we make out of fear? Really. How many times do we think the thoughts..."I'm afraid if I don't..." I'm afraid if I do..." Often we are paralyzed by fear, meaning we do nothing. FEAR-False Evidence Appearing Real.

Joshua faced his biggest fear this week. He did not go willingly. I began mentally preparing him about 2 weeks ago. I encouraged him the day of. Then I finally threatened to carry him to the car. Fortunately, he does not realize that I probably can' do that anymore. Anyway, he held back the tears and walked into the class. Thankfully, he had his sister, who is part fish, right beside him.

Joshua has always had a fear of water. He has learned to tolerate getting his face wet, but will not get in water without a life jacket and/or a floatie. I took him to swimming lessons when he was three. He still remembers it...and how much he hated it. So now, four years later he is again facing his fear.

On day 2 he was holding back the tears when it was time to go to class. I shared with him a time when I was scared as a kid. I also shared with him Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind." I told him to pray that verse and that I too would pray it for him. The most frequent command in the Bible is "Do not be afraid". Can you imagine a life without fear?



Notice...the smile is real!

When I picked him up on day two, he ran to me exclaiming, "I liked it mom, I liked it!" He found out that if he put his ears under the water...when he came out he could still hear. And if his nose went under the water...he could still smell. He learned an important lesson...False Evidence Appearing Real.

I give credit to his amazing teacher who is patient and gentle. Joshua allows her to lead him into deep water because he trusts her. She will lead him, be beside him, and if he sinks, she will catch him. He believes that and follows her wherever she leads in that pool.

I can't help but see the similarities in my relationship with the Lord. How many times have I sat on the side of the pool, with my toes in the water, hesitating, because I did not trust He would catch me?

Some days, I feel like I am in the deep water, not sure if I am going to sink, but knowing if I do, He will catch me. Even if my worst fear becomes a reality, then God will take care of me. I can't just "trust that God will not let it happen"-that is conditional faith. I have to trust and know that in all things, He is faithful..even when my ears and nose get wet!

Oh, to see Joshua's smile. He is no longer in bondage to his fears. He has faced them head on and knocked them out! Way to go Joshua!

The things they say...

It has been a few months since I did one of these....

Lydia "I have never been to a wedding before!"
Me "no, you haven't"
Lydia, "well except you and daddy's...I was in your belly."
Me, "no sweetie, you weren't born yet."
Lydia, "I know...I was still in your belly."
Me, knowing this was not going in a good direction."No, you weren't there yet."
Lydia "Then where was I?"
...and for one of the few times in my entire life...I had no answer for her. Luckily Joshua saved me and explained that he was "borned" first so she could not be there yet." She was satisfied.

Lydia, "mom, are cowboys for real?"
Me, "yes."
Lydia, "no, I mean are they alive, do they live really or are they pretend?"
Me, "yes, they are real people,why?"
Lydia, "they have farms right?"
Me, "yes...with pigs"
Lydia "I am going to marry one!"

In the dentist office...for the third hour (me and all three kids had a check up)...
Me, "Katherine, talk quietly...listen how quiet it is when you are not talking."
After listening for a moment she says, "quiet does not feel comfortable for me, I don't like it."

At lunch one day...
Me, "Katherine, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Katherine, "nuffin"
Me, "Nothing? are you sure?"
Katherine, "nuffin."
Lydia, "oh, so you want to be a mommy!"

In Walmart, we were in an aisle with a very large woman, I see Katherine looking at her and she says, "Mommy, she has a big, big, big, biiiiiig, biiiiiig...."
I, knowing what was coming next, literally ran down the aisle.
Katherine, "big bottom!"
So instead of running out of the store, or just finishing the remainder of my shopping, I see this as a teaching opportunity, I very quietly stopped and taught Katherine that we should not say people have big bottoms, big bellys or for that matter anything big. I explained that it may make them feel sad or mad to hear her say that. Then feeling satisfied with myself and my ability to seize a good parenting moment, turned into the next aisle where there was another large woman. Right as we passed her, Katherine proudly exclaims while pointing, "See mommy, I didn't say she had a big bottom!"

Joshua, who has an incredible memory says to me, "I'm starting to lose my mind."
Me, "what are you talking about?"
Joshua, "Now that I am in school everyday, all the time, I have other things in my head and I am forgetting some things...like when Katherine first went to the beach."

Katherine looked out the car window and said, "look mommy, a cut moon!"

And one of the most precious. Back in May, at 6:30am Katherine ran into our room and exclaimed "Mommy, come see-there is a rainbow out my window!" She was so full of excitement, she grabbed my hand pulling me from the bathroom to the window. She swung the shudders open and said, "see blue, purple, and orange...but no lelo (yellow)" What she was perceiving for the first time was the beauty of the sunrise.

Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord. Psalm 33:12