FEAR

Fear. How many decisions do we make out of fear? Really. How many times do we think the thoughts..."I'm afraid if I don't..." I'm afraid if I do..." Often we are paralyzed by fear, meaning we do nothing. FEAR-False Evidence Appearing Real.

Joshua faced his biggest fear this week. He did not go willingly. I began mentally preparing him about 2 weeks ago. I encouraged him the day of. Then I finally threatened to carry him to the car. Fortunately, he does not realize that I probably can' do that anymore. Anyway, he held back the tears and walked into the class. Thankfully, he had his sister, who is part fish, right beside him.

Joshua has always had a fear of water. He has learned to tolerate getting his face wet, but will not get in water without a life jacket and/or a floatie. I took him to swimming lessons when he was three. He still remembers it...and how much he hated it. So now, four years later he is again facing his fear.

On day 2 he was holding back the tears when it was time to go to class. I shared with him a time when I was scared as a kid. I also shared with him Philippians 4:6 "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God and the peace of God which surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind." I told him to pray that verse and that I too would pray it for him. The most frequent command in the Bible is "Do not be afraid". Can you imagine a life without fear?



Notice...the smile is real!

When I picked him up on day two, he ran to me exclaiming, "I liked it mom, I liked it!" He found out that if he put his ears under the water...when he came out he could still hear. And if his nose went under the water...he could still smell. He learned an important lesson...False Evidence Appearing Real.

I give credit to his amazing teacher who is patient and gentle. Joshua allows her to lead him into deep water because he trusts her. She will lead him, be beside him, and if he sinks, she will catch him. He believes that and follows her wherever she leads in that pool.

I can't help but see the similarities in my relationship with the Lord. How many times have I sat on the side of the pool, with my toes in the water, hesitating, because I did not trust He would catch me?

Some days, I feel like I am in the deep water, not sure if I am going to sink, but knowing if I do, He will catch me. Even if my worst fear becomes a reality, then God will take care of me. I can't just "trust that God will not let it happen"-that is conditional faith. I have to trust and know that in all things, He is faithful..even when my ears and nose get wet!

Oh, to see Joshua's smile. He is no longer in bondage to his fears. He has faced them head on and knocked them out! Way to go Joshua!

The things they say...

It has been a few months since I did one of these....

Lydia "I have never been to a wedding before!"
Me "no, you haven't"
Lydia, "well except you and daddy's...I was in your belly."
Me, "no sweetie, you weren't born yet."
Lydia, "I know...I was still in your belly."
Me, knowing this was not going in a good direction."No, you weren't there yet."
Lydia "Then where was I?"
...and for one of the few times in my entire life...I had no answer for her. Luckily Joshua saved me and explained that he was "borned" first so she could not be there yet." She was satisfied.

Lydia, "mom, are cowboys for real?"
Me, "yes."
Lydia, "no, I mean are they alive, do they live really or are they pretend?"
Me, "yes, they are real people,why?"
Lydia, "they have farms right?"
Me, "yes...with pigs"
Lydia "I am going to marry one!"

In the dentist office...for the third hour (me and all three kids had a check up)...
Me, "Katherine, talk quietly...listen how quiet it is when you are not talking."
After listening for a moment she says, "quiet does not feel comfortable for me, I don't like it."

At lunch one day...
Me, "Katherine, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
Katherine, "nuffin"
Me, "Nothing? are you sure?"
Katherine, "nuffin."
Lydia, "oh, so you want to be a mommy!"

In Walmart, we were in an aisle with a very large woman, I see Katherine looking at her and she says, "Mommy, she has a big, big, big, biiiiiig, biiiiiig...."
I, knowing what was coming next, literally ran down the aisle.
Katherine, "big bottom!"
So instead of running out of the store, or just finishing the remainder of my shopping, I see this as a teaching opportunity, I very quietly stopped and taught Katherine that we should not say people have big bottoms, big bellys or for that matter anything big. I explained that it may make them feel sad or mad to hear her say that. Then feeling satisfied with myself and my ability to seize a good parenting moment, turned into the next aisle where there was another large woman. Right as we passed her, Katherine proudly exclaims while pointing, "See mommy, I didn't say she had a big bottom!"

Joshua, who has an incredible memory says to me, "I'm starting to lose my mind."
Me, "what are you talking about?"
Joshua, "Now that I am in school everyday, all the time, I have other things in my head and I am forgetting some things...like when Katherine first went to the beach."

Katherine looked out the car window and said, "look mommy, a cut moon!"

And one of the most precious. Back in May, at 6:30am Katherine ran into our room and exclaimed "Mommy, come see-there is a rainbow out my window!" She was so full of excitement, she grabbed my hand pulling me from the bathroom to the window. She swung the shudders open and said, "see blue, purple, and orange...but no lelo (yellow)" What she was perceiving for the first time was the beauty of the sunrise.

Blessed is the nation whose God is the Lord. Psalm 33:12

Lydia's Week

Lydia the morning after she lost both her bottom teeth!

Piggy Farm

Lydia has had a big week! First she lost not one but two teeth on Saturday! She lost one while eating dinner at her cousins birthday party. She lost the second one in the car on the way home from his party.

The video above is of us at a small farm with pigs. It was Lydia's first time seeing real pigs and at first she was surprised that they were not pink like on Babe, Charlottes Web, and in her many pig story books. However, as typical of Lydia, she quickly put her disappointment aside and enjoyed every minute with the stinky pigs! She even fed them a little. She was definitely beyond words with excitement!

Bubble bath and Pool Fun

We are spending lots of time in the water this summer! To add a little fun to the pool today, Steve filled it with bubbles. The kids played for hours. This counts as a bath...right?

I have posted a video for the first time, comment or email and let me know if you can watch it!

Joshua is 7

It's been forever since I have blogged for a myriad of reasons that I won't get into. Ithink I have some computer and camera issues worked out so hopefully I will be more consistent again.


Joshua had his seventh birthday last week. So many changes have taken place this year. Everything from riding his bike, to losing two teeth and learning to read. He is a great kid and a blessing to our family.


Ten months ago Steve was working a 3 week shift in C'ville. We came to visit him on a weekend and went to a park with a rock bed creek. The kids played in the creek and had such fun...I probably wrote a blog about it. Anyway, Joshua in his excitement about the creek said he wanted to have his seventh birthday party there. I told him that we could not because we lived in Louisville, not C'ville. He said everyone could just drive here. Of course I told him no one would drive that far.


Reminds me of a familiar Bible verse. Many are the plans in a mans heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails.


We celebrated Joshua's seventh birthday at that very park...right next to the creek. The children played in the creek all afternoon...it was just as Joshua had imagined 10 months ago!

And many folks did drive "that far" to celebrate with us!





Joshua was able to share his favorite spot in C'ville with many friends!

Mother's Day Top Nine

Since it was Mother's Day, I was given the gift of a little time to myself. So I read, had a few uninterrupted thoughts, and napped. During this time of reflection I began to think about my life as a mother. I came up with my top nine things I like about being a mommy. I really wanted a Top Ten, but my time of reflection came to a sudden halt with two crying children.

I want to preface this list with a comment for those of you who don't know us as well as our families and close friends. Our family has ups and downs just like any other. We have wonderful days, and we have days where I want to hide under the covers. Many days I feel like I do nothing but discipline and clean up messes. I am completely exhausted by 8:30 every night. I would love to sit and read a good book; go to a mall...alone...and roam; eat my food while it is still hot; and watch a movie from beginning to end without being interrupted, falling asleep, or feeling guilty.

With that said, here is my 2010 Top Nine Things I Love About Being a Mom (in no particular order, I am too tired to think that hard!)

1. The live performances. I love the theatre, the ballet, a good musical...in fact I once had season tickets to the Opera. Now I get to see Magic Shows, Dance Shows, and as you see pictured here, traveling bands.

2. Sharing in new experiences. The other day at 6:30 am, Katherine came running into my bathroom excitedly yelling "Mommy! mommy! come here" she took my hand, ran to the window, pulled open the shudders and said, "look it's a rainbow in the sky! See? Blue and purple and orange... but no yellow (pronounced lello) but that's okay (yellow is her favorite)." Actually it was the sunrise, I suppose the first she had truly seen. I stopped what I was doing and we sat and watched the sunrise and colors change together.

3. Creativity. I never know what the bunch is going to do next. House boat? Moving? Yard Sale? Have a wedding? This morning they were building a kitchen. The other day they were eating lunch under their chairs... evidently there was a big storm coming; this is a picture of "Moving Day" it took about 15 minutes to make this mess.

4. I am constantly learning. Like today for instance. We visited a church for the first time. They had a little children's sermon in the middle of the service. It brought back memories of my childhood...which obviously clouded my decision making. We sent all the kids up onto the stage. Steve questioned if Katherine should go. I said sure! Evidently I was wrong. We were about half way back and I could tell she was getting wiggly. Then her head disappeared. I began praying real fast that she was not crawling under the pews to get to us. That was about the time I saw the pastor, who happened to be seated on the front row...in front of her...bending down...farther and farther, then he began speaking to someone who was obviously on the floor. Thankfully, the little sermon came to a close and she left the sanctuary smiling with Joshua on one side and Lydia holding tight to the other.

5. Fun. Play-doh. Bubbles. Tea parties. Hide and Seek. Salt painting. Coloring. Swinging. Dance parties. Silly books. Painting toenails. Just fun things that as adults we get too busy to do.

6. Being a mom encourages me to be in the Word. I have lots of parenting books, but the Bible is by far the best. Seeing how they are bent toward sin and encouraging and guiding them how to recognize it and resist it has only made my own sin nature more evident to me! Whether it is selfishness, speaking harshly, or being judgemental...as I turn to the Scripture to guide them, it also guides me.

7. Watching Steve. I love to see Steve turn into the tickle monster and chase the squealing and screaming kids all over the house. I love how he carries them to bed each night. They all have their favorite "carries". Joshua likes the military carry, Katherine likes the baby carry, and Lydia likes the upside-down piggy back ride.

8. More Learning. My mom was not half as crazy as I thought she was.

9. Cuddle-buggin'. That's what we call it around here.